Sometimes it can be difficult to find the words for exactly what you find special about a place. It could be a scenic view, a savory flavor, or an adventurous experience, but often it is something less succinctly explainable. If I were to try to describe Albania, I could tell you of the Accursed Mountains of the North, the crystal waters of the southern Albanian Riviera, or the hilltop castle of Gjirokastër, but that doesn’t scratch the surface of why we felt called to be here. My passion is to tell the stories of the specific lives that God has lifted up. I want to not just tell you how Albania is wonderful, but to show you the eyes of those of who are raising this country up to be a place of love, refuge, and peace.
The first of these stories begins with a couple who approached me at church one Sunday in early 2018. Pal (pronounced like our Paul) and Ueda (ewe-AY-duh) were looking for someone to photograph their upcoming wedding in July. Over time, as I learned more about their lives, I knew it was important for more people to know them. By getting to know the journey on which God has led them, you can begin to understand the Albania that we have come to love.
Pal and Ueda both grew up in and around the city of Lezhë in northern Albania, but they had very different lives. As a child Ueda mostly kept her head down.
“I [grew] up timid, not very open with people. I didn’t like to share my [struggles] with others. I just wanted to study hard and compete for a good degree at University… The purpose of my life was to finish school with good marks and then to have a good job so I could help my family a little bit.”
In Albania’s honor-shame culture, Ueda’s situation is common: to show your weakness to others is to bring shame on yourself, but a successful person receives honor. In a country where career opportunities can be scarce at best, this creates a vicious cycle that leaves many unhappy, feeling trapped, anxious to escape at any cost. A few stay and attempt to find their way here at home, but many emigrate to other countries like Italy, Germany, or the U.S. in search for a living.
Pal’s path as a youth was different, and yet he also felt trapped; his efforts to fulfill the expectations of others and still achieve his own dreams became an impossible burden.
Before I learned about Jesus, especially in high school, my life was a mess. I was a good student, but when I started high school, because of the financial problems in our family I wanted to quit school. But for some reason [it] never worked. Thinking this way all the years of high school made [me] a bad student. I would leave classes, hangout with the wrong people, trying to create an image that wasn’t me. My life was filled with lies, fear, troubles. All the time I felt a need for God and wanted to understand more about him. But my fears and sins kept me away.
At the beginning of their stories, it seemed that Pal and Ueda were running in different directions, but God was guiding them towards a crucial intersection.
Like many Albanian, Ueda grew up in a nominally Muslim family: they claimed the faith in name, but did not practice its tenets. Her main religious influence was her grandmother, who prayed daily and told Ueda that her god was Allah, but Ueda always felt something was missing. According to her religion, she knew it was impossible to have a personal relationship with Allah, but that was what her heart needed. She needed someone bigger than herself, to whom she could cry out everything in her heart, and who would speak back to her. While in high school, her search led her to the Catholic church near her school, where she tried to pray to this God who had reportedly walked among men on Earth.
… I heard about Jesus, and their God that sacrificed his son for his people.
Pal was raised Catholic, but in the same way as many Albanian Muslims, his hard-working northern Albanian farming family would only visit church on special occasions or holidays.
Since I was involved with the Catholic Church as a kid, I heard about Jesus a lot. I knew He is God and he paid for our sins, but also we had to do the rituals and did not have the security that our sins are totally forgiven.
In a similar way to Ueda, Pal wanted a relationship with God, but found something that did not fill the hunger in his heart.
The turning point in each of their lives came in university. As they made friendships with other students, their friends began to bring them to meetings with Instituti Jeta e Re, New Life Institute (a ministry otherwise known as CRU in the U.S.). Pal explains:
My family and friends were far from me, but there was one friend in Tirana whom I grew up with. He invited me to have coffee with two of his friends. And there I started hearing about Jesus. I heard about a personal relationship with Jesus.
These friends showed Pal love. They talked with him. They respected him. They shared their struggles, doubts, fears, and beliefs. Similarly, as Ueda’s friends began bringing her to IJR for fun events, she began to learn more about the God she had prayed to and sought for so long.
It was something new for me to hear that Jesus wants to have a personal relationship with me, that we can have time with him, worship him. These facts touched my mind and heart. I started to read the Bible, to know more about who is God: and his name is Jesus. God showed his face in my life.
Pal found that, as he built a true relationship with Jesus, he was no longer confused or seeking affirmation wherever he could find it.
The security that I have in Jesus now is something I never had before. I might not become a good person, but I’m accepted and loved the way I am.
It was just as much of a game changer for Ueda.
From a timid girl, I started to be more social to have time with people and to share the Gospel with everyone close to me. I had some [struggles] with my family about faith, that I changed [my faith], but even in these situations God was there for me. I found peace in his arms in every situation in my life. Now, I am extremely thankful to him for what He did and is doing in my life. He is growing in me a heart to worship, love and serve Him for all of my days.
They not only found a new faith, but a renewed purpose as well. They began to serve in IJR’s ministry, which is how they later met, and then fell in love. When they decided to marry, however, they faced a new problem. Ueda’s family had never approved of her change in faith, and they refused to accept her decision to be with a Christian man, denying Pal and Ueda’s request for blessing. In humility, rather than make a defiant statement, Pal and Ueda waited and went to their knees in prayer for the hearts of their families.
In the end, Ueda’s family relented, and I was honored to be present to see these two incredible people become one. Seeing the families join beside them as they said their vows was a beautiful sight. (Photos of the day are below.) At the time of this writing, their families have not yet accepted Christ, Pal and Ueda have not stopped praying that they will come to know God’s love and find the same joy.
There is an expression that I have used to express my life in Christ: “I don’t know much about God but what I know has changed my life.”
Just after getting married, the two of them moved to the city of Shkodër in northern Albania, where they have committed to serving IJR in the local church and ministries, telling others about how God changed their lives and inviting them to come along side them in eternity. It brings me great joy to think of what God is doing in their lives. One look into their eyes is enough to instill incredible confidence and excitement for the lives of whatever people cross their paths. Albania will be a vastly more lovely, caring, and Christ-like place when they are done with it!
——–> If you would like to partake in the work God is doing through these two, please go to this link and help support them through your prayers and giving: https://give.cru.org/0790936 <——
